i'm not as much of a wanker as it seems.

( fucking christ. )

this comic is completely, utterly, painfully shit. there is no single redeeming feature about it. in this comic, and i say this with the full and overwhelming contempt i reserve especially for people who do this exact thing with this exact website, randall says "hey i go on tvtropes, IT SUCKS YOU IN" and it's meant to be funny. and on top of that, there's a thread about the comic full of people doing that fucking "OH NO YOU LINKED TO IT" crap

hey? do you know how linking to tvtropes, where you link to an article that explains terminology you're using or gives background information on a topic, is like rickrolling, where you pretend you're linking to something relevant or interesting so as to fool the person into clicking through to a video of rick astley singing 'never gonna give you up'? i'll give you a hint: it's not, that was the closest thing he could think of to a joke for the final panel

i just... what can i say? this comic is utter shit, because there is nothing more to say about it. it's dull, it's boring, it's worthless, and it's presented by the same guy that once pulled off shit like this and this and this. and now he's doing bloated 24-panel obscenities about "hey how about that internet right right"

there's no originality, there's no incisiveness, there's no... interest any more. it's watching a stand-up comedian go through the motions with jokes about the internet and hack observational humour. seriously, when was the last time a joke about writing in the 'do not write in this space' box could reasonably expect to be funny? if he hadn't mentioned it in the alt-text, i'd be waiting for something about the 'this space intentionally left blank' pages. and how about when you mean to type one thing but type another instead, guys? ain't that a drag?

it's depressing, is what it is. he can do better, and he's not, and it sucks to watch it happen. and i guess this is probably my last entry on the topic, because that's my underlying problem with all of this, and it's what i've been trying to express with the rest of the entries. the comics themselves piss me off, i'm not going to argue that. they're bad comics, and i treat them as such. but xkcd, early xkcd, is still excellent, and i keep reading because i want to see good comics again. it's a bummer.

just to remind you, this is what kate beaton has been up to, john campbell continues to kick randall's arse on his own simplistic-art terms, and sheldon is bringing the goddamn hilarity.

from here

also good recently: this overcompensating, this pictures for sad children, and this cat and girl

and this sheldon made me laugh so incredibly hard. fuck i love sheldon. it's in the top 5, easily - a lot of other comics are smarter or have better art, but sheldon's writing consistently makes me laugh in a way that the other ones don't. like, look at the other links - one's a ridiculous situation involving a trailer-trash yahweh, one's anti-humour, one's barely even anything approaching a joke. and then look at the sheldon one. you can see the difference for yourself, and it does that style of comedy so well

also also good recently: this a softer world, which i will now never stop thinking about

what else is in life

oh yeah. going to noosa for a week on sunday. so... well i guess this doesn't affect much to be honest. radio silence on livejournal, i'll probably still text tweets if i want to say something, etcetc. life continues but more so. i'm broadly sorting shit out i guess

fuck it, it's xkcd-hatin' time. and by hatin', i mean, if you have any love for the latest xkcd comic at all and you don't want it to feel like i'm attacking you personally for thinking it's funny, i'd scroll on by. i'm not attacking you, because everyone has their own sense of humour and everyone finds different things funny, i'm attacking this fucking comic for not being funny enough for me. and by 'not funny enough for me', i mean... well, trust me, i have strong feelings on this comic.

( comic in question )

okay, seriously, what the fucking fuck.

this shit, it's just...

( needless stuff about the open-source boob project. )

anyway. back to the point, which is hating the comic.

it's shit.

it is dull, it is boring, there is nothing in this comic worth even a chuckle or faint traces of a smile. if this comic were a joke, it would be one that goes along the lines of, "a man walks into a bar and he asks for his favourite drink. he can't get it."

seriously, break this fucker down, and what's the joke? "geeks try to reorganise social attitudes towards sex. they can't, because they don't understand how society works." what the fuck is that? THEY'RE FUCKING GEEKS. IT'S WHAT THEY DO. (for anyone who didn't visit the website, the alt-text explicitly says "geek circles", by the way.)

it is possible to get humour out of the social ineptness of geeks. the IT crowd is a perfect example. if you boil down something like "the haunting of bill crouse", the joke is distilled into "moss tries to tell a lie, but fails, because he's socially awkward". but the episode works, because it takes that joke places. it escalates the joke and it creates a comic farce and it becomes something truly ridiculous. but this comic is bullshit, because it doesn't take the joke anywhere.

the most elaborate, sympathetic summary of this comic's joke is this: "geeks try to reorganise social attitudes towards sex to avoid drama. they can't, because they don't understand that society doesn't conform to strict rules like geeks think that it should." that's fucking it. there's no "they can't, and then they create a massive social shitstorm". there's no "geeks have sex but there are hilarious consequences, so they try to reorganise social attitudes". there is no bare-bones, stripped down version of this joke, because THE JOKE IS THE FUCKING BARE-BONES VERSION.

we don't even see what the drama is. we get a graph telling us that the drama level increases. that is one goddamn step up from a narrative box saying "but unfortunately, drama increased after they changed the rules".

what's the first panel? the set-up. good. that makes sense. i don't know why there's a third person there if they just say "okay!", i don't know who the fuck would ever say "let's agree to change them, and make sex simple!", i don't exactly know why randall drew a girl saying sex has all these crazy social rules but if i felt like being critical i could make a guess. and guess what? i'm feeling critical. so fuck you, xkcd man, for making sure it's a girl geek who complains about how complicated sex is. you can't make a joke about how socially-inept geeks are while at the same time making sure you use a girl to complain about how dramatic sex is so you can avoid drawing a comic with a socially-inept male geek, which would just make it seem like he was bitching about not being able to get any. shit don't work that way. go the whole hog bagging the stereotypical image of geeks

second panel. "hooray, we've solved the problem of drama! i'll go tell everyone!" good for you little buddy. hey, how did you solve "the problem of drama"? what's that, it's not mentioned because randy skipped that trifling bit of the FUCKING BASIS OF THE GODDAMN JOKE? this guy can make comics as big or as long as he wants. we've seen it before (shit, go ONE BACK) and we'll see it again. he's not fucking limited to four panels here.

but no, he doesn't explain what the "crazy social rules" about sex are, or how they "create drama", or explain how they "solved the problem of drama", or what sort of drama happened after the increase, or why the rules failed, or how people are complicated, or how the guy told everyone, or ANYTHING AT GODDAMN ALL. fuck, if the guy at the end even walked back in wearing an unusual hat or covered in tar and feathers or carrying a fucking spork, it would be better, because we'd get some sense of the aftermath. that's right, this comic could be IMPROVED by a spork. that's how fucking bad i hate this, i'm willing to admit a "LOL SO RANDOM" object would improve it

this is what i meant when i compared it to the joke above. it can be funny! i'm sure it can! if it's explained who the man was, what bar he went into, what drink he asked for, why he couldn't get a drink, when he went in, any bit of elaboration at all, we could be apples. if the man was a sandwich, and he asked for his favourite type of food/drink and couldn't get it because the bar "doesn't serve food", that's a joke right there. you see?

"someone walks into a bar and asks for food. the barman doesn't give it to them and explains the reason."
"a sandwich walks into a bar and asks for a pie. the barman says 'sorry, we don't serve food here'."

this comic could be funny - could be funny - if it was anything more than a vague narrative outline of events. but it's not, and it sucks, so go to hell

today's cat and girl is excellent work, particularly this panel:



apart from that: half a bottle of vodka and half a bottle of tequila is a killer. and i was expecting to come home this afternoon to a far worse post condition than i did (melbournemaniac, i mean), which was actually really pleasing because i enjoyed seeing everyone's opinions on it

carry on

i really enjoyed this panel of today's dino comics.

there is not much else going on in my life

OH

a door closed in my life and it is a strange feeling. i'm not used to it. there are a lot of doors i have wished were closed at various points, but i can't think of a single instance where there has been a single solid moment where that was it - that was the end. things have faded away i mean, or simply not been revived, but this was the first time it has ever been "it's over. goodbye" and i know that neither i nor the other person will try to bring it back

i wish i could do this to more things in my life and know the other person won't try and cling on

but i don't trust anyone not to

so i guess there is not much else going on in my life, but there is one thing less than there was a day ago, and that is an Event? i don't know

this is how i know i'm too tired and need to go to sleep

when i look at this comic and don't go "heh, those are sort of cute plays on song titles"

but instead wonder why randall felt the need to make a four-panel joke with an atrocious set-up just to make two pop culture jokes eta and then write like 800 words about how much i hate it. fucking christ, do i have a geek stick up my ass tonight.

( fuck you randall, i didn't know i was so frustrated about your recent comics )

the epic journey continues.

( INSIDE! )

ALL DONE i know i ran out of steam but fuck it, your problem not mine

i find myself making more and more links/references to webcomics these days. which is all well and good, but i haven't sat down and looked at the list of webcomics i read for a long time, and hell, i may as well show you guys so you know. who knows, maybe we read a few of the same ones?!

( onwards to... well, me being an over-analytical geek, quite frankly )

TO BE CONCLUDED... IN MY NEXT ENTRY. WHICH I WILL START IMMEDIATELY AFTER THIS